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Saturday, March 1, 2014

A Rosy by Any Other Name...

Parents with a child with cerebral palsy live with the tedium of repetitive labor and the subtle terror of expecting something bad to happen that day.

Yet there's a sliver lining in all this, right?

When in doubt, take funny pictures of your children.

They say that people grow to love those whom they serve - which is very, very, true. They say you grow to adore those family members, especially a child, who are so vulnerable (see my previous post). They also say that we develop coping mechanisms to manage the less, shall we say, attractive portions of this job. 

(BTW, I'm not exactly sure who "they" are, but "they" say a lot of things, don't "they"?)

Here's the official definition from our friends at Dictionary.com:


verb (used without object), coped, cop·ing.

to struggle or deal, especially on fairly even terms or with some degree of success (usually followed by with ): I will try to cope with his rudeness.
to face and deal with responsibilities, problems, or difficulties, especially successfully or in a calm or adequate manner: After his breakdown he couldn't cope any longer.

If you go to the site and type in the code ALT / CONTROL / BS, the site resets to reveal the actual definition. Try this some time and see what happens.



verb (used without object), coped, cop·ing.

to struggle or deal, especially on fairly uneven terms or with some degree of feigned success when, in actuality, you are manifesting the stress in some other way such as alcoholism, weight gain, excessive denial, excessive distraction, random acts of emotional outbursts, blaming of close associates and/or one's particular deity, deep selfishness with the justification of hella yeah I deserve this and/or so-called "coping mechanisms" which are known to be simply less obvious forms of denial.  (usually followed with): I will try to cope with his rudeness but, when no one is looking, I will so Bruce Lee all over him.
2. to face and deal with responsibilities, problems, or difficulties, especially successfully or in a calm or adequate manner in front of others, except when posting on Facebook: After his breakdown he couldn't cope any longer, so he ordered a pizza and played video games all night. 

Behold! 'Tis Foameo and Drooliet!
One of the ways our family "copes" with challenges is humor. No surprise there. A big part is the use of funny names. I know "they" prefer that we use "correct" terms for things, but "they" need to relax a little and allow people to have a little fun.

(A good example is using the word penis instead of weewee, but we prefer the more colloquial term jinglybells. The last one makes us laugh.) 

Having a child with cerebral palsy means that every solid, liquid, gas, shape, smell, texture, taste, sound and horrific sight will be coming your way, so some of us have to do something to manage the input.

See? We're coping!

Sign the Confession! SIGN IT!

Excerpt, The Tavares Family's Official Codebook of Absurd Replacements:


Tinkles: Number 1

Rosy (per my mother, "Ladies do not stink. A lady's bathroom smells like roses."): Number 2

Grand Rosy Explosion and/or Natural Disaster and/or Hazmat Level Five: Don't ask.

Sanitation Device: Diaper

Power Gloves: Hand orthotics

Super Sandals: Feet orthotics

Swat Vest: Torso SPIO vest for trunk control

Power Puffs: Inhaler

Twitchy Mctwitches: Seizures

On The Air: Her cochlear implant is active

Miriam's Mercedes: Wheelchair

Grins and Giggles: Body cream after a bath

"God Bless Us, Every One": Give Miriam something that's actually meant for Dad, like an extra slice of cake.


See? It's much more interesting!

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